Pat, keep your suicides straight.
Never did I say I would walk
into a river. Remember? All my jokes
are about ovens. All my favorite
stories begin with “Le Creuset.”
Since you asked, I’m wearing black
underwear, a black turtleneck,
and black rain boots. I’m going
ice skating. Suicide by ice skate.
I’m going to shock everyone
at Rockefeller Center
with my apropos of
Je suis incroyable!
I hope Rockefeller Center
has robot insurance and
I assure you
is always, entirely
Signed, A Robot